Friday, February 10, 2017

Fear

Nearly everything I do, or don't do, is because of fear. I'm probably afraid of you. Is fear the opposite of love? I don't think I agree with that. I think you can love and fear at the same time, after all, we're supposed to fear God. In that sense fear is part of respect. The problem with our earthly love and fear is that our love is flawed. "Perfect love casts out fear" (1 John 4:18) I am far from perfect.

Sometimes I don't even try. I'm afraid of failure. I already feel like I've failed at so many things. I'm constantly letting people down, so I don't commit myself to things. I'm afraid of helping wrong, not saying the right things, not saying enough, saying to much, not playing the right role. It makes me so anxious that it's crippling. I'm always disappointing someone. Especially myself.

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